If you want to have more influence in business and stronger negotiation skills, you need to be more fluid in your thinking.
Most people’s conversations exist in a box instead of being fluid, so it is essential that you improve your language patterns and become flexible in your position.
There’s a saying in negotiation that the person who has the most influence and the most charisma will usually get their way. So here are a few tips which could tactically change your life and business when you apply them.
Let’s take the power of paradox. Most people are either “this is the way it is” or “this is not the way it is”. If you can hold both sides of a belief at the same time, this will make your thinking more fluid. When you are able to step into someone else’s shoes, you gain rapport with them and therefore create more influence.
When it comes to right or wrong, if you live in this paradox you are completely limited to one particular framework with anything outside of that not able to exist. It is actually the midpoint between right and wrong where breakthroughs and new information emerge. When you are fixed in a position, the other person fixes into their position, but if you become more fluid in your thinking and unfix your position, this will unfix theirs. Learn to drop outside of the paradox and see situations from both sides. Ask yourself “if this wasn’t true what new things could I see?”.
Language is limiting as it is made up of circles and turned into linear form. Nothing is absolute when things are always expanding or contracting. However, if you can start to use circular language patterns you will be more congruent with the way the world actually works.
So notice the paradoxes. Look at your language patterns and when you’re being rigid. You need to respect the other person’s perspective and also hold yours as true in order to have more influence. Remember that all possibilities co-exist at the same time and you must be able to dance within those possibilities.
One more paradox is you may find these tips useful or not useful for your life and business, so find the point in the middle and you’ll find the right information.
Take care,
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